ʻO ka moe me kekahi hoa: nā pōmaikaʻi a me nā pilikia

Ua manaʻo nuiʻia he hikiʻole ke aloha ma waena o ka wahine a me ke kanaka ma keʻano maʻamau, a ma kekahiʻaoʻao aʻo kekahi paha, e hoʻemiʻia nā mea a pau i ka wahine. He mea hikiʻole ke haʻi inā heʻoiaʻiʻo paha kēia aʻaʻole paha, akā,ʻikeʻia heʻoiaʻiʻo, he pilikino ka pilina aloha i hikiʻole ke kapaʻia he lapuwale. A he mea hiki ke hoʻomaopopo - he ikaika loa ka makemake o kaʻoihana physio a hiki ke alakaʻi i ka pilina o ka poʻe i loko o keʻano o ka pilina aloha maikaʻi a me kekahi wahi pili. Eia kekahi, no ka wahine e makemake ana i ka wahine,ʻo ka pilina me ka hoaaloha maikaʻi loa, i ka neleʻana o kahi hoa noho mau, ua aneaneʻo ia he koho kūpono. Ke kaumaha wale nei ka hapanui o nā kānaka i ka nīnau hoʻokahi wale nō - he aha ka mea e pili ai i ko lākou aloha i kēia hihia aʻo ka piliʻana paha o ka pilina ma waena o lākou me ka makeʻole?

ʻO ka moe me kekahi hoa: ka pōmaikaʻi

ʻO kekahi o nā mea nui iʻoi aku ka maikaʻi o ka moekōkino ka mea maʻalahi a me ka hoʻomahaʻana i loko o ia mau pilina, ināʻike nā hoaʻelua i ka pono o ka wahine. E moe wale kekahi me kekahi wale nō ke nānā wale lākou i kēia a me ka mea wale nō e hauʻoli ai nā mea a pau. Hāpaiʻia nā hālāwai kūkā me ka noʻonoʻoʻole, me kaʻole o nā koi a me ka pēpē, me kaʻole e makemake i nāʻano aloha. ʻO ia, ma ka'ōlelo maʻalahi,ʻo ka pilina alohaʻaʻole ia he mea e like me ka pili like, aʻo ia wale nō.

A eia kekahi, no ka maʻamau, he nui nāʻano likeʻole.ʻO ka mea mua loa,ʻaʻohe hana o kaʻimiʻana, a me ka makaʻu e hiki i ka pilina e like me kona makemake i nā kāne a me nā wahine, no ka mea, uaʻike pono kekahi i kekahi. Uaʻike lākou i ke kuleana a me ka maʻalahiʻole, hiki iā lākou ke hana i kekahi hana a lākou e makemake ai, me ka nānāʻole, eʻoliʻoli aiʻole e hōʻike iā lākou iho ma mua o kā lākou. ʻOiai inā he mau pilikia i ka hana, hiki i nā hoa ke hoʻomau i nā pilina aloha a hiki i nā mea e hiki ai ke kūkākūkā pū me ia i ka ho'āʻoʻana i kahi pilikoko pili loa.

Eia naʻe, hiki i kēia ka mea wale nō ma lalo o nā kūlana e kū nei me kaʻoiaʻiʻo a me kaʻoiaʻiʻo i kekahi i kekahi. ʻAʻohe o lākou e manaʻo malū e pili loa kā lākou pilina ma hope o ka pilina. Inā he kāne a wahine paha (ʻo ia hoʻi nā wāhine),ʻo ka mea liʻiliʻi aʻaʻohe paha, he manaʻolana no kekahi meaʻoi aku iʻoi aku ka hewa ma mua o ka pilina, a laila ma hope o ka moekolohe, e nalowale ka hoaaloha no ka wā pauʻole. E like me ka hōʻikeʻana o nāʻikepili, ma hope o ka pilina piliʻana, kahi kanaka no kāna wahine pumehana pinepineʻole e lilo i mea aloha aʻaʻole paha,ʻo ia hoʻi, he kāne. A inā ma iaʻano, ma hope o ka moekolohe, e ho'āʻo ke kaikamahine e hoʻohālike i kekahiʻano'ē aʻe, koe wale nō keʻano o ka hoaaloha,ʻo ke kanaka e nele loa i kona ola. ʻO ia ke kumu no ka mea nui i nā kaikamāhine a me nā wāhine e hoʻomanaʻo e hikiʻole i ka wahine ke pale i ka pilikino a wale nō inā makemake lākou e hoʻomāʻona i ka makemake wahine, aʻole. Ināʻole, he mea nui loa ka loliʻana i kahi hoaaloha.

ʻIe me ka hoaaloha: cons

ʻO ka hapa nui o ka moe aloha,ʻo ia ma ka hihia he nui kahi pilina e pili pono i kahi'ē aʻe, a hiki i ka manaʻo e makemakeʻo ia i kahi meaʻoi aku ma mua o ka pilina, a ināʻaʻole i paneʻia kāna manaʻo,ʻaʻole ia e pane e paio.

I ka wā ma mua,ʻo ka hoʻolālāʻana i keʻano o ka pilina a me ke aloha i nā mea a pau,ʻo ia ka mea e alakaʻiʻia ai i ka lukuʻiaʻana o nā pilina aloha, a me nā mea i'ōlelo muaʻia ma luna nei, i ka hoʻokeʻe holoʻokoʻa ma waena o ke kāne a me ka wahine. He mea kaumaha ke hoʻomaopopoʻana i kēia, akā naʻe, ma ka hapanui o nā hopena,ʻo ka hopena o ka moekoloheʻana e like me kēia.ʻO ka nohoʻana i kēia hihia,ʻaʻole ia e waiho i ka wahi no kaʻuhane,ʻaʻole hiki iā ia ke hoʻololi i nā loina mua.

ʻO kekahi,ʻo ka nui o ka nele i ka moe alohaʻana he hopena maikaʻiʻole ia i ka piliʻana me nā mea aloha i ka wā e hiki mai ana. Iā lā, ināʻike kekahi kanaka ua moeʻo ia me kāna hoaaloha, ināʻaʻoleʻo ia e haʻalele iā ia, eʻoi loa aku paha konaʻano lili i kona mau hoaaloha a pau, nā hoa hana, a pēlā aku. Pēlā nō,ʻaʻole paha he wahine e hilinaʻi nui i ke kanaka keʻikeʻo ia ua moeʻo ia me kāna hoaaloha maikaʻi.